It's getting worse before it gets better...

Well, as most of you all know, the drama continues with Reese's father. He has completely flipped his gourd and I met with my lawyer once again this morning. I'm getting shit settled here this time, come hell or high water. And yes, it's about Reese, and what's best for him, but I do believe that what would be best for him, if he cannot have two cooperative and respectful single parents, would be to have one that is not disturbed, harassed and bullied. And of course, that one is me. It has to be me, because I'm his mom, I've been his only parent for the majority of his life, regardless of what his father thinks. If I could only change two things in my life it would be: a) Don't bother getting Reese's dad to sign his birth certificate. Let it sit as "unknown," there are far worse stigmas in life. b) NEVER EVER UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES would I have lived with his father ever at all. Never. If I had followed even ONE of those protocols, life would be infinitely better. But as I did not, here's what has to happen now. We must go through legal proceedings once more. They must continue on until a conclusion and it must be the one that will make Reese most happy and comfortable, but also allow me to retain my sanity. And frankly, I don't know if I can retain my sanity when his father feels that he can control me through Reese. How is that ever acceptable? It's not. I'm moving forward. He will, hopefully, be put back in his place, and maybe farther away from where his original position was, because frankly, right now he is angry, and defensive and bitter and poisonous. I don't know what's going on with him right now, but there's too much crazy floating around for him to be in charge of the small boy at this point. And when I say crazy, I don't even mean the fun kind. Not even close to the fun kind. This is crazy crazy. Bad stuff. Worse than I think I've ever been, and I always thought I was not all that great. But his crazy delusions make me look rational, reasonable and sane.

I start a new job tomorrow. No...wait...Monday. Next work week. It should be good. I'm not going to spill too much on here, cause I'm still not really clear on what the job actually entails. It's government. The pay is decent, and it's part time and temporary. That's about what I know.

So, off to the farm tonight. I told Reese I'd pick him up early tonight so I guess I better get some stuff done here. Like dishes and packing. Lots to do. Reese is just so incredibly PSYCHED to see Nana's new puppy. He came yesterday. He is small and sheltie. I'm kind of excited to see him too. Sheltie puppies are too cute for words. Poor Karma. Gonna be a long haul for that long suffering old doggy.

Ta for now.

H